The Trap of ‘One-day’ Dreams

 

nightfox
It’s easy to spend years dreaming of that special something, or someone, that’s going to magically change your life for the better: the job, retirement, baby, boss, success, qualification, lover, empty nest, dress size, friend, opportunity, or home.

I spent years waiting for this kind of magical ‘one-day’ myself, and here’s what I know.

‘One-day’ dreams are little more than wishful thinking.

Wishing, hoping, and waiting for that special something, or someone, who’s finally going to transform our life and help us feel how we long to feel: loved, free, safe, powerful, fulfilled, recognised, worthy, complete or whatever.

Don’t get me wrong, having a vision of a bright future’s important.

It gives us inspiration and hope. It can offer clues to our deepest Self and potentials. It can motivate us to reach for our ideals.

But magical ‘one-day’ thinking is different, and somewhat risky too.

It can keep our eyes, and energy, so fixed on a better horizon that our present life becomes little more than something we have to get through or improve.

But the present moment is the only place we ever really get to live.

It can cause us to passively wait, like a damsel in distress, for that pseudo-Knight who’ll come and miraculously make it all better.

But the Knight rarely comes, as life typically wants us to dig deep and make the miracles happen ourself.

It can lead us to that longed-for job, baby, lover, home, money, and the like …and straight into the realisation that nothing’s really changed, inside of ourself.

‘One-day’ dreams can be little more than an addictive psychic trap that promise us a fairytale ending. A time when we can forever escape from our suffering, struggle, and pain.

Like all addictions, this thinking brings us the highs (hope, anticipation, thrill of achieving eternal happiness), the lows (loss, disappointment, frustration when our fantasy is thwarted), and an insatiable search for the ultimate fix to our troubles.

‘One-day’ fantasies aren’t simply about our idealised future; they’re a way of running from our self.

Running from our current suffering, troubles, struggles, and pain …and even our power and potentials.

The only remedy is to stop, and turn to face ourself.

We need to find ways to honour our suffering, troubles, struggles, pain, power, and potentials.

We need to refocus our energy, and do what we can to feel how we want to feel this day, rather than ‘one day’.

We have to stop waiting for that magical something, or someone, to rescue us and instead step up, tap into our own magical power, and do what it takes to rescue ourself.

When we stop running from ourself, we come home to ourself, and find ways to feel loved, free, safe, powerful, fulfilled, recognised, worthy, and complete within ourself.

I ain’t running from myself no more. Are you?

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